What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

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I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

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Aodhan peanut head Hearty

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A man walks up to another man and asks what time it is. He then replies " It's 2:00" The man then pulls out a sandwich and eats it

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OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

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yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

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Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

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whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

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Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The pizza delivery guy. Oh hi.

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

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Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

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Q. what do you call a black guy? A. N IGGER

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What job did the black man apply for?.. Several, its a downward economy.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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