How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

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How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a terrorist.

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What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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What is black, often hung by a rope on a tree, and something white people like to play with? A tire swing.

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

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There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a rapist.

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The pizza delivery guy. Oh hi.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was hungry. Thats why.

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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