How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

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What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

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No.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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I told you it would happen

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

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the WNBA

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Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

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John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

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So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

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What'sucks and white Jackson

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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