How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? get in the car

how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

Whats worse than finding a jew in you bed. Jake skellern

How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had died.

my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...