You know what they say about a guy with big feet? He wears large socks and has big shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Sally with prosthetic arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops