A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

Hi

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

sexual intercourse.

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

400 asian people walked in a bar

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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