"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops