Roses are red, violets are blue, I told you she was my Mom, but that didn't stop you!

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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A girl gets raped -teagan d

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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Q. If Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were both drowning, what kind would you make? A. PBJ

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

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What do you call a generally un likeable person who has a habit of drinking in a bar? A Bastard.

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how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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#Hanging Degus

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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what is a bracket? a bracket

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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Andy Carrol

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops