How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Dance is a sport

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a man said hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

falling didnt make the difference

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a BMW and a murder victim? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Mormons having fun.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was being deporting because he over stayed his visa and is now an illegal immigrant

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops