Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

A blind man walks into a wall.

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

What worse than the holocaust? Danny's.

Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

Snarf Nuggets

Sally was ugly like a shaven babboon So she created her own little cacoon And within a week she finally emerged And she smelled like shit what a psycho

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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