A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

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Some peoples attempts at being funny on this website are the stupidest things i have ever read.

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Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he does it the same way everybody else does.

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

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In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

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What do you call a black guy who kills people? A murderer.

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Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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