A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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Get in the car.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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