A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole.

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

You're welcome!

What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...