What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

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Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

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penus

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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A gay guy and a blind man walk into a bar. It's a gay bar. The blind man is also gay.

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Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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fruit salad?

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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