Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

- I'm in my mum's car, broom broom. - Get out me car. - Aw.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

wheres binladin? at the bottom of the sea wanking over amy winehouse

what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

your moms my other ride

How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

what is the difference between a park bench and a black guy? the park bench is an inanamite object and doesn't have feelings

Anyone??????????/

A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

What color was the duck? It had one foot.

how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

a man walked into a bar ouch

Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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