Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones... and my pistol will kill you.

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Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

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What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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your going to die

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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out of your comfort zone

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A: What's worse than two dead babies lying on cement? B: The Holocaust? A: Yeah or something like that

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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