What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

Anthony Dephillips is handsome

You're flying over a lake in your canoe and the wheels fall off. How many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? None! because ice-Cream doesn't have legs!

Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a terrorist.

There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

Like why period? Why can't mother nature just call and be like ''Wassup girl? You're not pregnant, I'll talk to you next month.''

There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

A homosexual walks into a church

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

Women's sports.

What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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