What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

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What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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TWIX PAUSE!

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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Knock knock. Come in.

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

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Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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