I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

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A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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What does the scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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