What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

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Q: A Blonde and a Brunette fall of a building which one hits the ground first? A: The Brunette because she ways 200 pounds and the Blonde weighs 100.

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Tits In The Third Grade? A. Because She Was 21

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What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

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A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

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Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

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What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

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How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

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What do you call a billionaire who lost a large portion of their net worth? A millionaire.

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Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they want to. This is a free country, where people are free to travel as the please, no matter what their sexual orientation may be

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whats better than an anti joke? a joke that you find funyer than an anti joke

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

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A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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