You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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