What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET BEYOND THE SIXTH SENSE! 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :(

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How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

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Why didn't the black guy where a seat belt? I don't know but he should've because hes dead.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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So many dudes win with your mom who even knows if i'm your father!!

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What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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If an anti joke is told, and it is about an aunty is it an aunty anti joke? Adolf Hitler.

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Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A penguin in a blender.

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What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

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GONNA

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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roses aren't red, violets aren't blue, they're all black, cause i'm colorblind. what about you?

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What's worse than getting raped by a black guy? Getting raped by a radioactive black guy

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what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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