Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

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25

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

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So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

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Ron Paul for President!

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How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

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Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

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Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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The other day, I broke my snare drum.... I still haven't fixed it and am planning on doing so soon.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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Why did the boy laugh? Because someone told him a joke.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Roses come in a variety of colors.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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Yo mama so fat She could die any day.

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What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

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rebecca is a hard worker

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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