Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. His death was mourned by his wife and three children who wished he would not have been so reckless.

Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

How can you tell the person who stole your car was black? Stereotyping is wrong.

Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

What did the boy say during his math test? Nothing, talking during a test is prohibited.

How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

Why did the man stop eating? Because he took an arrow to the knee.

I wonder if barrack Obama will rename the whitehouse...to the blue house because it is his favorite color

What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

A three and a half foot tall clown walks into a bar, it is quickly learned that he is only 8 years old and is excorted out by security.

How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

Q Why was the boy sad A he wasnt sad he was dead and therefore had no emotional feelings

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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