What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

womens rights

theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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