Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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Women's rights.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one Cool

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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