How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

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What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

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What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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Neither does he.

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Snow White found a magic lamp in the middle of the forest. She rubbed it and became pregnant because the spout was a penis.

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Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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