Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

LOL May Wong

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

yolo mother f-uckaaaa

what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

White people talk like this 'HEY' Black people talk like this 'YO' Hundreds of thousands died in the civil war.

What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

Whats better than 24? 25.

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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