What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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25

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What is worst then falling off a tree....... Falling off a bigger tree

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

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Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

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What Do You Call Black People Skydiving? A fun time.

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i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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why does god like Justin Bieber? He can't god doesn't like the devil.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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A women's opinion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops