What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

whos the bitch now!?! you are.

three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Who saw 9/11 as a miracle? The undertakers

What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern ppoorrnnoo-graphic collections.

what do you call a man with no penis? what ever his name is

Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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