What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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HEY YOU!!!!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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>posts joke >mistaken for anti-joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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