Knock knock Get off my porch.

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

Why did the dude fall into a box? Because he was hit by a bus.

Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

Why did the dog eat poop?

What god did Bill believe in? No god, Bill is an athiest

An Asian fails their maths exam.

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...