Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

Why can't Billy ride a bike? Because he's a fish

Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

thumbs up!

Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...