Your mother is a very respectable woman.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

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What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller have a baby? A: Because she is dead. ...I IS HORNY!

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You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

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Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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whats good about poland... fukk all

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a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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roses are red violets are blue im in class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops