What is long and black The unemployment line

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If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

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Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

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when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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One time I masturbated by myself

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

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Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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THIS IS an anti-joke.

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

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Whats better than 24? 25.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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