A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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1 fish 2 fish red fish wait why is the fish red , oh I forgot I killed it

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Whats 9 + 10? 19.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

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today a nazi canadian killed himself the world is now a better place

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call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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