I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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Charlotte Bobcats

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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so dont touch it.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kill children dont worry about it

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What did the dead person say? Nothing, dead people cant talk, coz they are dead

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--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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Jersey Shore

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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