.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An apple up your ass, a penis in your ramen, finding out you have herpes, or many other scenarios. In short, there are many things worse than finding a worm in your apple.

Why couldn't the mexican get a job? He was seven.

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

Has anyone seen that clown that hides from gay people in Tesco's

a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

Roses are red Violets are blue TEST: Are roses red?

Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...