Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do kallum and joel have in common they both work at club getaway

thumb_up thumb_down +20

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Tifa, seriously... You cannot look like the game character and have the same name! HEY I am craving for a bit of infamy, how about we claim that we is I! Which will make me seem completely pathetic for spending the whole night chatting with myself... Which is not bad at all actually...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +20

this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops