Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

Did you hear about the homeless man? He asked me if I had any spare change. I didn't. I found the encounter to be very depressing.

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

Knock Knock trick or treats? here is the candies, have fun kids!

what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

Why did the skeleton stay home from the party He was buried in a coffin underground and, as a matter of fact, wasn't actually invited

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

1Q: Quick! Ask me if I'm a lemon!! 2A: Your not a lemon 1A: :/ oh :/

what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

What's an Anti Joke?

How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a shark in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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