How do you make Chuck Norris cry? Kill his family.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

Why does life suck? Because it does

Roses are red violets are blue my d*** is bigger than you.

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

matty russel are you on here

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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