"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

What is long and black The unemployment line

People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

sally stole a t.v what happend next? she was arested

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

Like why period? Why can't mother nature just call and be like ''Wassup girl? You're not pregnant, I'll talk to you next month.''

What is Lil Wayne's first name? Wayne

the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Q: why id the bird fly away from the boy? A: cuz he was scared

Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

Nicolas Cage's acting.

Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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