Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

Men don't cum twice easily. That's why Jesus hasn't been around for awhile.

the love boat

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

An Asian walks out of the library.

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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