Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Knock knock "Who's there?" Blood on the Dance Floor "Ha!"

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

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What's black and hangs from tree's? A suicidal black man.

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why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Two tigers, walking down Oxford St. One turns to the other & says, "Quiet for a Saturday, don't you think?"

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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A fat lady walks into a bar. Your probably wondering what she ordered. She ordered a ham burger.

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Bake until golden at 375

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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