My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

Chuck Norris will inevitably pass away sometime in the future.

A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

Catholicism.

what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

A Mexican man is sitting in his mansion.

what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 8 year old in my trunk

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

why was the boy running? because his skin was burning off

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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