Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

How do you find a date? Look on the calendar!

Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

-_- i like trains ... -_-

why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Every seat wsa taken, and the back was her only option

why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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