How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the girl get for her birthday? Older.

thumb_up thumb_down

These Jokes suck.

thumb_up thumb_down

what is the difference between a park bench and a black guy? the park bench is an inanamite object and doesn't have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

thumb_up thumb_down

So a Moose walks into this store, and walks up to the lady bitch, and he goes "Hey, lady bitch, where the potatoes?" So the lady bitch goes "Heheh, their in aisle 5." So the moose goes down aisle 5, and there aint no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down

I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down

When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the single guy with no arms get for christmas? porn.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

thumb_up thumb_down

A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

thumb_up thumb_down

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops