how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What is harder than Jenga? Being a quadraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Woman's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the Chinese man have a cat in his oven? Because his wife had decided to divorce him that day so he threw he in the oven, and the cat happened to be in her arms at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops