Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

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What's worse than a Wasp at a picnic? Two wasps at a picnic. What's worse than two wasps at a picnic? A serial rapist. What's worse that a serial rapist? Three wasps at a picnic.

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like a someboyyyyyyyyyyyy

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

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What did the monkey say to dog Foreskin

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What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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american government

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

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Whats fleash color flesh color and fleash color? a hodo rolling down a hill.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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so dont touch it.

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And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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