There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

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What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Whats black and white with red all over? A dead panda

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Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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