Boy:well you merry me. Girl:no Boy: why not? Girl:becuase you're rapeing me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man go to the gym? Because he was severely fat and would live a short life if he didn't lose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call 10 dead babys lunch

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A planes crashes on the US-Canada border. The survivors are promptly taken to a hospital nearby to be treated for their injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

thumb_up thumb_down

donald................duck for president

thumb_up thumb_down

this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

thumb_up thumb_down

you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down

How does a muslim make his parents proud? He gets good grades.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops