Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did the Homosexual say to the Southern American? I'm A Homosexual. What did the Southern American say back? I Respect That.

A man walks into a bar and brings a Snickers. He gets a beer, eats the candy, and leaves leaving the wrapper. The bartender is angry with the littering but cleans it up and serves another customer.

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

Oh...okay, good.

What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

I had sex with my mother in law

guhhjghkjghjgkwefyuwefgehdfbfryfgwdfhdbfadhfbewifoyqgefhqjdbsjdkdfbnqerwifuqbdjsa wuefgeyfgdshkjjhgfiuyegfdhfbdksabnfehwbfeiofqwrypweqiryewpiryewufhdjfbxncmsbahewf bdcuhbwewhuxnyfurgbcyuiwfbewcyiubnyfeurieixybnqweircbnewociuxnbweu crbweyuicyxbreuwxcybewuoiqbyxeowucybnqweucbnowieywicybrqweiubncyqoweubnrcyuowiebno

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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